It All Comes Down to Love

My excuse was the holidays. With all of the hustle bustle , I just didn’t notice. Throwing cookie parties, shopping, going to the post office, waiting for news about my sister in laws baby delivery, buying birthday gifts + tons of Christmas gifts, finding clothes for mass, seeing friends, etc.. I just didn’t notice.

“She’s just getting old”, I thought.. “it’s typical for her age.”

Whatever my excuse, I finally realized, my dog Mallory wasn’t quite right. I’ve probably known intuitively for a long time. Her breath remained bad even though she’s on a good diet, and her hind legs began to shake a few months ago. She did appear to be losing weight and her food stayed there often but she always had a ton of energy when we came home and when it was time for her daily walk.

But I should have known. She’s got a liver disease. It’s the same one her mom, brother and sister died from within the past few years. When I got her weighed at the vet, I was surprised to find out she'd lost over 10 lbs. Her long hair hid it for so long.

When I finally got the test results back, the vet told me to come right in and we’d start the IV. I dropped everything, got dressed and came in. I couldn’t even cry because she hates stress and can’t stand anyone yelling or crying. I promised I’d remain strong for her.

Friends responded quickly to my urgent plea for prayers and asking support for Mallory. We spent two days between my husband and me, at the Vet while she got the IV. She came home with us at night with it, because I didn’t think she’d make it without us. She gets terribly depressed when we’re not around.

I brought my books, my blackberry and my journal and Sway had his computer when it was his turn. But, Mallory liked it best when I sang to her and hugged her and pet her. I sang her a song I made up, “Jesus loves the little doggies”. I think she particularly liked that one. I had to continue to reassure her when she tried to pull out the IV with her teeth.

The technicians and the staff said we were troopers for camping out. But I have no idea what other people would do? Would they leave their dog there? A hospital is a lonely place. I know, I’ve stayed in one for a month when I had my baby. (Truth be known, I got a ton of work done, watched a lot of great movies and enjoyed my time there with the exception of all of the tubes and such!)

But being with Mallory, sitting, laying on a bean bag trying to get comfortable with my pinched nerve in my back, there wasn’t anywhere else that we’d rather be. Love is love. It doesn’t matter if its your dog or a baby or a friend. If you love someone, you’ll do what you can to help them feel better and survive whatever they’re doing through.

Mallory will be on her 3rd day of an IV today at home. We'll take turns. The vet is a personal friend so she'll probably come over and deliver more fluids for us. My mom came over at 5am this morning to help us change the bad but for some reason it wouldn't work.

We'll do what we can do for Mallory to make her comfortable and to give her the best chance at a good life. If it becomes unbearable for her, I'd rather have her out of her misery. I can't stand to see her suffer. I want her to have a good quality of life and not one where she's in pain. I only want the best for her because I love her.

It all comes down to love.

Mary's comment:
Sadly, Mallory died about a week after this post. Sway and I worked hard to keep her alive. We consulted with a homeopathic doctor, and our vet. We administered IV's to her for 5 days 24/7. We sat with her at the vet and at home and when she stopped eating, we syringed fed her for about a week both day and night. We were mentally and physically exhausted. When we realized that nothing was going to cure her, we decided to have her put to sleep. We did it because she no longer wanted to be around anyone and she no longer wanted to eat.

We cried and criedd and didn't tell our son for a full day so we could be more controlled. When we told him he said that his "heart was cracking." I think we all felt like that.

We will always fondly remember Mallory - "Clew Bay Key West Wind" Our darling wonderful pet and friend.