Friday, December 30, 2005

Making (almost) Every Stranger into a Friend

It is possible you know! It is definitely possible that every person that you come in contact with can immediately be your friend.

Okay.. Okay! I know what you’re thinking! That friends take a long time to make and to get to know, that a good friend is worth more than silver.. and all of that. I couldn’t agree more, BUT… I do know that making friends is EASY.. if you just know how.

I have come to the point in my life because of trial and error that I now can meet any person on the street, any place, any time and any where and know that I can connect with them on a meaningful level. I know that anyone can do this, but it takes practice and the willingness to fail. Well, it can happen 9 times out of 10 anyway!

Today for instance, I flubbed. I got into one of those meaningless and stupid conversations. We continued to talk about NOTHING for a few minutes and I think that both of us knew that the conversation was going no where. It was boring.. or rather.. I was boring, and the conversation was one of those “do you know…” games. I finally left and vowed to have a more meaningful conversation with that lady at another date.

But mostly, the formula is fairly easy.

Realize that you are in control no matter where you go. Most people will NOT approach you… so if you want to meet people, you are going to have to have some courage and take the first step.
Connect immediately eye ball to eyeball, and coupled with a smile. It’s an unbeatable combination.
Say to the person, “Hi! How are you?” … before they even have a chance to look away from you. This opens the door for them to also offer friendly conversation.
Act friendly! That sounds redundant or corny, but its’ so true. If you ACT friendly, people will respond friendly. Its that simple.
Throw out a comment such as “Beautiful day, huh?”, or “Happy New Year”, or “Don’t you just love this place?” Whatever you say, say it with a genuine smile on your face.
· For those of you who can’t do this without a feeling of terror, then I recommend that you practice in front of your mirror every single day until you feel comfortable that you look acceptable to yourself.
· The more you practice the easier it’ll be for you in every day situations.
· Start small and start conversing with people in line at the check out counter or at work or at school.. wherever you go on a daily basis.
Compliment the person if you can, or ask a specific question such as “are you from this beautiful city?”
Speak clearly and confidently. Don’t shy away from the conversation. Be genuinely excited and happy to talk with the person and laugh if you can at some point during the conversation. It helps people feel comfortable with you!

Perhaps you’re not interested in making every person you meet into a friend. But if you are, these steps are tried and true. And in the event you meet a FEW people who you’d like to befriend, the same steps apply.

Good luck and to get started immediately.. it’s as simple as standing in front of your own mirror!

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